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How to Have Your Ex Return to You Like a Moth to a Flame Self Help Articles | July 11 Joe Blanton Jersey , 2011
If you have just gone throgh a breakup and every fiber of your being cries out to get your ex back, you probably can IF you take action right away. However, you'll never get your ex back if you do all the things that seem natural to you. Instead, learn how to be the flame that attracts your ex back like a moth.



If you want your ex back, you had better get started on healing the relationship today before it's too late. I know it may look like your ex ?hates? you but let me let you in on a powerful paradox: This is, in reality Gio Gonzalez Jersey , a very good sign.


?Hate? indicates that there are continuing feelings connected with the relationship and you can benefit from that. Ambivalence usually shows that the feelings your ex once had for you have now cooled and are not coming back. Between hate and ambivalence is a ?golden? time when you are able to win back your love but ONLY if you do it the right way.


The recipe for failure is found in your primal ?fight or flight? reactions coming from your brain stem. These panic reactions are not based in reason but, rather, basic survival. They are as old as time, inherited genetically from our cave man ancestors whose everyday life was a struggle just to endure. When being chased by a hungry dinosaur, you run... but if you run over a cliff, the result is the same as being eaten alive.


When a key relationship appears to be finished Stephen Strasburg Jersey , panicking is the last thing you should be doing. Here are some of the stupid things we do, robotically, when threatened with the termination of a love relationship:


1. We fault ourselves.


2. We apologize over and over again but end up appearing weak and pathetic in the process.


3. We promise to be a better person and appear weak and pathetic in the process.


4. We sneak around, stalking and spying.


5. We swear to them that we love them over and over again and look weak and pathetic in the process.


6. We try to transfer the blame onto them.


7. We contact their friends and relatives to determine if we can gain some leverage there and end up angering the very person we are wishing to win back.


8. We call them and text them continuously and end up looking weak and pathetic.


And, worst of all,


9. We PLEAD with them to come back making us look HOPELESSLY weak and pathetic.


The tricky thing to understand is that though all of these ?fight or flight? reactions come from a good Matt Wieters Jersey , loving place that only wants reunification in the relationship, they always end up backfiring which is exactly what you DO NyT want. To see this more clearly, imagine that the roles were reversed and your ex was acting out all these "fight or flight? crazy things in a desperate attempt to get you back. How alluring would your ex look to you then? YUCK!!!


What you need to do (and be) is something very different. You have to turn yourself into a ?flame? and your ex into a ?moth? that is irresistibly drawn to your light. If you look at it logically, you need to present your self as somebody of extreme value, a person worth getting back, somebody your ex believes he or she can not live without. You can't do this by seeming weak and pathetic. You do this by appearing strong and wise and maybe just a bit aloof.


There are many perfectly permissible Jayson Werth Jersey , psychological tactics that you can use to strengthen your case but you MUST do something very soon, before your ex finds somebody new and fades into ambivalence. There are books available that can help you with this. Buy a good one today and begin right away. Above all, avoid all those ?fight or flight? responses until you learn what to do (and be) that works to get you what you want and need.


I recognize, from personal experience, that breaking up can impact you like a ton of bricks. It?s simply devastating, like a fifty-foot tidal wave Shawn Kelley Jersey , knocking you flat. It seems like you can't breathe and panic sets in. In some instances there were ample warnings but you just blew them off or could not comprehend them, being certain, in your blindness, that you were secure in your relationship. And, from time to time, the breakup